Reports are saying that the future wife of Prince William is undergoing princess lessons. In layman's terms this is the ins and outs of behaving like a princess. In short, Kate is studying the royal etiquette.
This blog is as far as my common knowledge of etiquette goes. Of course so much royal etiquette is only for “royal” eyes but I doubt it is not much different from the values our elders have been teaching us.
Here a fun look at those sickening teachings our conservative parents and grandparents have been hammering all along. Who would've thought they are also taught to the members of the most powerful, richest and revered monarchy in the world?
It seems behaving and conducting one's self the proper way knows no boundaries nor limitations. It doesn't choose who to dictate itself into.
However, the ones who tend to adhere to these lessons become total, likeable, happy and successful individuals than the fanciful, hopeless and dejected ones who wouldn't even care for a manner or two.
Enjoy!
IN GREETING the QUEEN:
Say “Her Majesty” then use “Ma'am” on the following references.
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| Carla Bruni, First Lady of France, curtsying to the Queen of England. |
Always curtsy in the presence of the Queen.
TALKING:
Never ask anything personal from a mere acquaintance.
Be natural. No mimicking of accents.
Have eye contact, look happy and be light hearted but do not barrage anybody with jokes.
Never turn your back.
Never speak to a senior royal unless spoken too.
Opt for a low-pitched voice.
Never refer to your husband as “Mr.” except to an inferior.
Never use your husband's first name to anyone who shouldn't use the first name basis to him. Safest way is to refer to your husband as “My husband”.
In speaking about others below the pecking order “Mrs.”, “Miss” or “Mr.” should be used.
A younger person should not call a senior person by his or her first name unless allowed personally.
Do not pretend to know more than you really do.
Give undivided attention to the one talking to you.
NEVER SAY:
In our residence we retire early (or arise)
CORRECT WAY:
At our house we go to bed early (or get up)
NEVER SAY:
I desire to purchase
CORRECT WAY:
I should like to buy
NEVER SAY:
Pardon me!
CORRECT WAY:
I beg your pardon. Or, Excuse me! Or, sorry!
NEVER SAY:
Lovely food
CORRECT WAY:
Good food
NEVER SAY:
Elegant home
CORRECT WAY:
Beautiful house—or place
NEVER SAY:
A stylish dresser
CORRECT WAY:
She dresses well, or she wears lovely clothes
NEVER SAY:
Charmed! or Pleased to meet you!
CORRECT WAY:
How do you do!
NEVER SAY:
Attended
CORRECT WAY:
Went to
NEVER SAY:
I trust I am not trespassing
CORRECT WAY:
I hope I am not in the way (unless trespassing on private property is actually meant)
NEVER SAY:
Will you accord me permission?
CORRECT WAY:
Will you let me? or May I?
NEVER SAY:
Permit me to assist you
CORRECT WAY:
Let me help you
NEVER SAY:
Brainy
CORRECT WAY:
Brilliant or clever
NEVER SAY:
I presume
CORRECT WAY:
I suppose
NEVER SAY:
Tendered him a banquet
CORRECT WAY:
Gave him a dinner
NEVER SAY:
Converse
CORRECT WAY:
Talk
NEVER SAY:
Partook of liquid refreshment
CORRECT WAY:
Had something to drink
NEVER SAY:
A song entitled
CORRECT WAY:
Called (proper if used in legal sense)
NEVER SAY:
I will ascertain
CORRECT WAY:
I will find out
NEVER SAY:
Residence or mansion
CORRECT WAY:
House, or big house
NEVER SAY:
In the home
CORRECT WAY:
In some one’s house or At home
NEVER SAY:
Phone, photo, auto
CORRECT WAY:
Telephone, photograph, automobile
DRINKING TEA / EATING:
Raise only the teacup not the cup and saucer and return the cup to the saucer after each sip.
Do not chew loudly. Close your mouth when you chew. Take small bites. Do not slurp or talk with your mouth full.
Do not stack your plate.
The host always takes the first bite.
Stop eating when the host takes her last bite.
Eat what is served. Don't ask for anything that isn't there.
If something drops pretend nothing happened. Servants would tend to it.
No excusing of one's self to go to the bathroom. But if one has to he or she has to wait for the table to be cleared between courses. Excuse yourself to the one you're talking to. Hurry back for the next course wouldn't be served until you return.
DRESSING:
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| Adding a scarf to too bare shoulders is an etiquette. It doesn't attract too much leary attention. |
Rather be frumpy than vulgar. Celebrities often go frumpy to disguise themselves but vulgar persons are vulgar all throughout.
Buy good clothes but not more than what is needed.
Follow fashion but adjust it to suit body type and position in society.
Too plain clothes is totally out of proportion as exaggeration of the current fashion is.
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| Princess Diana showcasing a formal dinner dress. |
An informal dinner dress is low in front and high in the back with long sleeves or elbow sleeves.
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| Princess Mary of Denmark in a ball gown. |
A ball dress is one designed with a skirt that is suited for movement. Hair ornaments with a ball dress is recommended. But unless one really looks good with it then this is the only time one should wear it. Ball dresses also appropriate for gala nights.
A woman wears her hair the same way except in riding. Ergo, a woman shouldn't fuss too much with her hair.
It is always better to be under-dressed than over-dressed.
It is, most of the time, bad taste to wear more than 3 jewelry. That includes a wedding ring and a watch already.
AS a WIFE:
As an unhappy wife a woman's dignity demands she never show disapproval of her husband no matter how publicly he outrages her. It is already a misfortune not to have a gentleman for a husband but to draw attention to this would put the wife in his level.
If a divorce is unavoidable she discusses her affairs with immediate members of her family. It is vulgar to confide private details to reporters.
CONDUCTING ONE' SELF:
No name dropping including brands unless unavoidable.
Do not attract the wrong kind of attention. Avoid conspicuous clothes and manners.
Do not stare.
Do not tell your private affairs or innermost thoughts in public.
Do not use status adavantage over anyone.
Be considerate of the unfortunate especially to those in your employ.
Do not spend more than what you can and what you should based on your social standing. Do so after careful consideration of those who might see or know.
That's just about it. Of course there are still endless etiquettes unmentioned. In fact countless books have been written about it including how to prepare for one's wedding, how to ask a woman out, how to conduct one's self even in one's own house...
But the funny thing is many etiquette is directed towards men.
Seems being a gentleman carries more weight than being a lady. Or it's basically them who needs to be taught how to behave.
Cheers with the peace!
